The Spoon Theory written by Christine Miserandino

What they leave out of this is when you have a family, and you have to start taking THEIR spoons. And then you have to pay even more spoons for the guilt that makes you feel. 

One reason my kids are so responsible is becuase they HAVE to be. They help around the house so much because they KNOW I can’t. They have to pitch in, because sometimes it takes every spoon I have to just get out of bed, and they know it. We all budget MY spoons, and kids shouldn’t have to think about that. Those are spoons no kid should have to pay. 

Even on my good days I still have to budget those spoons like crazy. Do I have enough spoons to take them to the pool today? MAYBE, if I just sit on the side and do nothing. Or, I thought I did, but then underestimated how many spoons it would cost. 

There is so much they miss out on, becuase I just … can’t. Or, I COULD, but what will it cost me moving forward? And this doesn’t even include the extra that I take from my spouse as well. 
You never get a chance to stop thinking about those blankety-blank-blank spoons. Ever. 

And that is what happened this week. I was doing well, and then, BAM, put of nowhere, I hit the wall like a big on a windshield. I pushed just that one inch too far, one “system” I relied on didn’t work, and that’s it for me. I ran out of spoons and I’m now paying the price. It’s been almost a week now, and I’m still as bad off as I was on day one. 

My kids want me to go to the pool today. They want me to get in the water and play with them instead of “reading a book.” And I can’t. And now my “spoons” are costing them spoons too. And sometimes that just sucks.